Twelve Strategies of Compassionate Communication Within the 4 Keys

Mark Virkler's picture

Today I wanted to share with you the Twelve Strategies of Compassionate Communication from Andrew Newberg’s book Words Can Change Your Brain. Charted below for simplicity.

Before you encounter the person…

 

Newberg

Personalized by Mark Virkler

Related to 4 Keys

1

Relax

I become still, smile, laugh, yawn, stretch, relax every muscle, breathe deeply, pray in tongues (Ps. 46:10).

Key #1 Stillness

2

Stay present

I enter His presence with thanksgiving and praise (Ps. 100:4).

Key #1 Stillness

3

Cultivate inner silence

I still my thoughts – by seeing Jesus at my right hand and fixing my attention on Him (Acts 2:25; Ps. 16:8).

Key #2 Vision

4

Increase positivity

Thank You, Jesus, that You are here with me, guiding, anointing protecting, speaking, and granting wisdom.

Key #2 Vision

5

Reflect on your deepest values

Lord, what would You speak in this situation? Then honor His voice and vision (flowing thoughts and pictures).

Key #3 Flow

6

Access a pleasant memory

Lord, what is a story You would remind me of that would connect me with this person and with the truths You desire to release in this upcoming conversation?

Key #3 Flow

Once you are together with the person…

 

Newberg

Personalized by Mark Virkler

Related to 4 Keys

1

Observe nonverbal cues

Jesus, what do You want me to note from their nonverbal cues? Then tune to spontaneous flow.

Key #4 Journaling/Speak

2

Express appreciation

Jesus, what words of life would You have me speak to them about their accomplishments and hearts' hunger?

Key #4 Journaling/Speak

3

Speak warmly

Jesus, fill my tone of voice and countenance with Your compassion toward them (Eph. 4:29).

Key #4 Journaling/Speak

4

Speak slowly

I speak slowly, giving the Spirit time to illumine both my heart and their heart (Jas. 1:19).

Key #4 Journaling/Speak

5

Speak briefly

Pause continually so they can interject, resulting in a dialogue rather than a monologue. (Prov. 10:19).

Key #4 Journaling/Speak

6

Listen deeply

Listen to them and the Holy Spirit. Receive and speak ONLY what God is speaking (Jas. 1:19; Prov. 16:23).

Key #4 Journaling/Speak


Imitate Jesus as He perfectly MODELS communication skills

Observe how tenderly the Lord relates to you in journaling,
and express this same compassionate communication to others.

The Golden Rule - This ONE rule fulfills all rules

“Treat people the same way you want them to treat you.” (Matt. 7:12)


Two-Way Journaling Concerning Communication Skills

Excellent communication skills help you build and maintain relationships, which in turn, help you succeed. Ask the Lord to reveal how well you are fulfilling each of the truths below. Journal out what He speaks. I recommend you spend one journaling session where you let the Lord tell you how well you are applying the rules below to a particular individual. So to cover seven of your closest acquaintances, you would be doing seven journaling sessions. Cover your spouse, family, friends, business, and social acquaintances. A list of the above journaling questions can be downloaded here.

The rules for handling disagreements (How to Build a Winning Team – Virkler, Pages 35-38)

  1. Listen carefully to the position of the others and restate what they have said to let them know you have listened and to ensure you understand.
  2. Ask clarifying questions to understand what the true heart issue is.
  3. Listen to Jesus, asking specifically how He would have you build a bridge of mutual agreement.
  4. Pre-requisite to being listened to: three sincere compliments are needed before you offer a critique. The three compliments put you and them into a relational mode.
  5. State clearly what you are sensing from Jesus as the key points which are to be considered. (Don’t say, “This is what Jesus is speaking.”)
  6. Seek a win/win solution that accomplishes the heart's desires of each party.
  7. Choose unity rather than accepting stalemate and division.

Enhancing Communication Skills Series

  1. Enhancing Communication Skills
  2. Twelve Strategies of Compassionate Communication Within the 4 Keys
  3. Create and Sustain Romantic Love to Last a Lifetime
  4. Romancing the King of Kings
  5. Face to Face with Jesus, Our Perfect Model for Intimate Communication
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4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 305 Pages | Retail: $16.99

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond?


Price: $12.95

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice (hard cover)

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 305 Pages

40% off the suggested retail price!

For the first time EVER! Hardcover copies of 4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice. This is a magnificent, beautiful gift to give for any occasion. Retailing at $24.95, you can purchase it through our website at only $15.00! Bless people with the gift of spiritual intimacy with the Lord Jesus Christ. Get a souvenir copy for yourself. Only 600 copies produced, so order while supplies last!

Price: $15.00

Dialogue with God

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 296 Pages

This top seller for 30 years from Bridge Logos provides a narrative, right-brain presentation of the principles of how to hear God's voice. Especially enjoyable for personal use, it makes a great gift for introducing a loved one to the voice of God. This book teaches the four keys to hearing God's voice in readable style, and also devotes two entire chapters to moving samples of people's journaling (i.e. their two-way dialogue with God).

Price: $16.99
Hear God's Voice Guaranteed Package

Hear God's Voice Guaranteed Package

9 Books, 10 CDs, 10 DVDs at a $30+ savings

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond? When things don't seem to be going your way and your prayers aren't answered the way you had hoped, wouldn't it be great to hear Him tell you where He is in the midst of it, and what He is working out in your life? Are you ever just a little bit jealous of others who say with such confidence, "The Lord said...."?

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How to Hear God's Voice

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 317 Pages

We recommend that you order the newest revision of this book titled 4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice. It includes 95% of the content of How to Hear God's Voice but is reorganized so it fits perfectly with the 10 DVDs on this subject by Mark Virkler. In addition, it gets you started using the four keys earlier in the book and gives you more journaling samples and exercises. Since we have removed the large margins, it is a smaller and less expensive book.

Price: $19.95

Prayers That Heal the Heart - Revised & Expanded 20th Anniversary Edition

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 320 Pages

Prayer counseling that breaks every yoke! Everything you need to experience deep healing of your soul and spirit.

Did you know that you don’t need to be continually plagued by negative thoughts, feelings, pictures or memories?

It is not part of the "human condition" to feel the constant nagging of doubt, insecurity, or anger. No matter what sin you are trying to overcome, what lie you think you’ll always believe, or what traumas your heart has suffered in the past, you will receive total freedom and restoration by praying these prayers in faith. 

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Counseled by God

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Have you ever been defeated by negative emotions such as anger, fear, guilt, inferiority, condemnation or depression? Have you tried to fight them off unsuccessfully? Is there an answer that is deeper than simply trying to mentally reason yourself out of these emotions? Is there a way that Jesus can speak a word of life into the depths of your emotional despair and bring healing on a deep level? Is there a form of Christian counseling that begins and ends with the movement of Christ within your heart, rather than simply with the words of man?

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Hear God Through Your Dreams Workbook Cover

Hear God Through Your Dreams Workbook

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 92 Pages

A new book has just been released that accompanies this workbook: Click here for Hearing God Through Your Dreams by Charity Kayembe and Mark Virkler (featured on Sid Roth's "It's Supernatural", with almost a million views just on YouTube).


Do you often wake up feeling there was a significant message in your dream, but you’re just not sure what it is? Like Daniel and Joseph, do you long to be able to help others understand their own dreams and win them to Christ as you explain His night messages to them? Wouldn't it be nice if you could receive mid-course corrections from the Lord while you sleep? Do you wish you could be receiving divine inspiration, creative solutions to problems, and direction from the Lord during that third of your life that you’re “just” sleeping?

Price: $11.95

Hearing God Through Your Dreams

by Mark Virkler and Charity Virkler Kayembe | 292 Pages

Learn How to Hear God’s Voice, Even When You Are Sleeping

It is always fun to be on the winning team. Well look what God has done with Charity's new dreams teaching. It has taken off like a rocket with a live TV interview on Cornerstone Network and her Sid Roth interview which has almost a million views on YouTube!

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Everyday Angels

by Charity Virkler Kayembe and Joe Brock 289 Pages

You can partner with Heaven’s angelic hosts!

Do you have guardian angels? Does God want you to know them? Find out what Scripture reveals and how YOU can interact with the company of Heaven!

The supernatural realm permeates our natural world! Therefore, experiencing angels should be an everyday occurrence–we simply need to open our spiritual eyes to their reality and role in our lives.

Price: $16.99

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