Hear People's Hearts Going Beyond Words to What the Heart is REALLY Saying

Mark Virkler's picture

Your wife screams, “You never say you love me.” You answer, “That’s not true. I told you I loved you in our marriage vow and if it ever changes, I’ll let you know.”

OK, in this example both parties are getting it wrong. For the wife, it would have been better if she could have said, “I feel starved for love and affection. Can you please show you love me by …?”

This lets the husband know there is an ache in her heart, a void that needs to be filled, and a specific action he should take to help fill that void.

Now for the husband, he should have been listening with his heart and asking, “Lord, what is my wife’s heart really saying?” If he does that and tunes to flow, the Holy Spirit will drop thoughts into his mind that his wife’s heart is starving for MORE affection, and he is responsible to provide that to her. If he is not sure how to do that, then when things settle down a bit, he should ask her, “What specific things could I do to show you how much I love you? Would you write down for me the top three specific things I can do, that are meaningful forms of affection for you, and I will get busy doing them?”

Rules for the road when it comes to listening to another’s heart

  1. Never respond hastily to harsh words spoken. Take a moment and ask the Lord what the real heart issue is that needs to be addressed. Tune to flow, hear from Him.
  2. Speak only words edifying for the need of the moment. If you don’t have something kind and encouraging to say, then say nothing. Go in prayer and get something kind to say, and then come back and say it. Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear (Eph. 4:29).
  3. Never answer in anger. A gentle answer turns away wrath (Prov. 15:1).
  4. These three principles should be enough to get things on the right track.

How to restore your first love

If you have lost your first love, the Bible has a clear solution for that.

You have left your first love. 'Therefore remember from where you have fallen, and repent and do the deeds you did at first (Rev. 2:4-5).

  • Remember by picturing what it used to be like when you were romantically in love
  • Repent for letting your heart grow cold
  • Do again what you did when you first fell in love

We each have our stories of what we did when we first fell in love. I remember what it was like when I first fell in love with Patti. We were at Roberts Wesleyan College. We just wanted to be together all the time, to share every moment together. We scheduled classes together, had morning devotions together, ate breakfast, lunch and dinner together, and did homework together in the library in the evenings. We read through the New Testament aloud together, we partnered as youth pastors for the Avon Wesleyan youth group, and during summer vacations, when we were separated, we wrote love letters to each other EVERY single day (and I was a guy who hated writing… but love changes everything)!

What were your first days of being in love like? Remember, repent and begin again doing the things you once did, so the flames of love burn brightly in your marriage. Pretty easy solutions, don’t you think?

Additional resources for enhancing love and understanding

  • Enriching My Marriage: How to express honor and fill up your “Marriage Love Bank” (Blog)
  • 4 Keys to Hearing God’s Voice: Discover how easy it is to hear the voice of your Wonderful Counselor, and let Him counsel your marriage (DVD training course with book and workbook)
  • Prayers That Heal the Heart: Get rid of the baggage you bring with you into the marriage. By starting with a clean slate, you don’t drag a load of garbage into your marriage (DVD training course with book and workbook)
  • Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul (Book)
  • Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul (Book)
  • The Treasure Chest: “Spirit-Led Prayer Organizer Devotionals to Meet Your Specific Needs.” Containing 40 prayer approaches which provide tools for achieving spiritual victory.

 

 

 

Add new comment

Comments

Anonymous's picture

I read cwgministries.org everyday, i love this blog !

Add new comment

CAPTCHA
This question is for testing whether or not you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.
8 + 2 =
Solve this simple math problem and enter the result. E.g. for 1+3, enter 4.

Results

Results 1 - 10 of 424

Pages

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 305 Pages

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond?


Price: $$12.95

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice (hard cover)

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 305 Pages

40% off the suggested retail price!

For the first time EVER! Hardcover copies of 4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice. This is a magnificent, beautiful gift to give for any occasion. Retailing at $24.95, you can purchase it through our website at only $15.00! Bless people with the gift of spiritual intimacy with the Lord Jesus Christ. Get a souvenir copy for yourself. Only 600 copies produced, so order while supplies last!

Price: $$15.00
4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice Audio CD Package

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice Audio CD Package

By Mark Virkler | 4 Keys book | 10 hours of CDs | LEARN notebook

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond?

Price: $$77.85
4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice DVD Package

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice DVD Package

By Mark Virkler | 4 Keys book | 10 hours of DVDs | LEARN notebook

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond? When things don't seem to be going your way and your prayers aren't answered the way you had hoped, wouldn't it be great to hear Him tell you where He is in the midst of it, and what He is working out in your life? Are you ever just a little bit jealous of others who say with such confidence, "The Lord said...."?

Price: $$87.85
Hear God's Voice Guaranteed Package

Hear God's Voice Guaranteed Package

9 Books, 10 CDs, 10 DVDs now at a $50+ savings

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond? When things don't seem to be going your way and your prayers aren't answered the way you had hoped, wouldn't it be great to hear Him tell you where He is in the midst of it, and what He is working out in your life? Are you ever just a little bit jealous of others who say with such confidence, "The Lord said...."?

Price: $$175.00
Prayers That Heal the Heart

Prayers That Heal the Heart

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 320 Pages

Prayer counseling that breaks every yoke! Everything you need to experience deep healing of your soul and spirit.

Did you know that you don’t need to be continually plagued by negative thoughts, feelings, pictures or memories?

Price: $$14.99
Hear God Through Your Dreams Workbook Cover

Hear God Through Your Dreams Workbook

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 92 Pages

A new book has just been released that accompanies this workbook: Click here for Hearing God Through Your Dreams by Charity Kayembe and Mark Virkler (featured on Sid Roth's "It's Supernatural", with over half a million views just on YouTube).


Do you often wake up feeling there was a significant message in your dream, but you’re just not sure what it is? Like Daniel and Joseph, do you long to be able to help others understand their own dreams and win them to Christ as you explain His night messages to them? Wouldn't it be nice if you could receive mid-course corrections from the Lord while you sleep? Do you wish you could be receiving divine inspiration, creative solutions to problems, and direction from the Lord during that third of your life that you’re “just” sleeping?

Price: $$11.95

Hearing God Through Your Dreams

by Mark Virkler and Charity Virkler Kayembe | 292 Pages

Learn How to Hear God’s Voice, Even When You Are Sleeping

It is always fun to be on the winning team. Well look what God has done with Charity's new dreams teaching. It has taken off like a rocket with a live TV interview on Cornerstone Network and her Sid Roth interview which has over 750,000 views on YouTube already!

Price: $$14.95

Counseled by God

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 146 Pages

Have you ever been defeated by negative emotions such as anger, fear, guilt, inferiority, condemnation or depression? Have you tried to fight them off unsuccessfully? Is there an answer that is deeper than simply trying to mentally reason yourself out of these emotions? Is there a way that Jesus can speak a word of life into the depths of your emotional despair and bring healing on a deep level? Is there a form of Christian counseling that begins and ends with the movement of Christ within your heart, rather than simply with the words of man?

Price: $$9.95

Everyday Angels

by Charity Virkler Kayembe and Joe Brock 289 Pages

Act Now: 

You can partner with Heaven’s angelic hosts!

Do you have guardian angels? Does God want you to know them? Find out what Scripture reveals and how YOU can interact with the company of Heaven!

The supernatural realm permeates our natural world! Therefore, experiencing angels should be an everyday occurrence–we simply need to open our spiritual eyes to their reality and role in our lives.

Price: $$16.99

Pages