Don't Go Near the Harlot's Door!

Mark Virkler's picture

Question: How do I handle my sexuality? It is such an intense, persistent and driving force. I battle with pornography. How do I tame this monster within me? I see so many people and even Christian leaders fall, and I don't want to fall. I want this to work! I feel trapped and no-one is preaching a sermon on how to handle this. So I grit my teeth, try my hardest, and fail over and over again, and then get consumed with shame. Can you help me? Have you found any answers that work?


Answer: The Bible talks about  these temptations when it warns against getting involved with the harlot. “Keep your way far from her and do not go near the door of her house,” for sexual sin will bring destruction to your life (Proverbs 5 - 7). Sex is such a powerful force that we are told to “flee” from lust (2 Tim. 2:22). Don’t stand and battle: GET AWAY! You're right, we all too frequently hear the news of ministers failing because of sexual impropriety. What a shame; satan is picking off our leaders one by one. It is time to make a clear commitment not to go near the door of the harlot.

But what if the harlot brings her door right into our homes, through our TVs and our computers as R- and X-rated programs, movies and websites that offer themselves to us daily? Now the door is SO close, and the temptation is so powerful! How can we possibly close these doors? Below, we are going to show how these doors can be closed and how you can ensure a strong, fulfilling, intimate marriage.

Close 4 Doors Which Lead to the Harlot's House

  1. Computer: I have chosen to use Net Nanny on my computer. It blocks all sexual sites, and my wife has set the password to help protect me, our marriage and our ministry.
  2. Television: We use ClearPlay as our only DVD player, so any movies we watch automatically have all sexual scenes and profanity removed.
  3. Movies: We also have a household rule that we will not go to an R- or X-rated movie. Why would we want to defile our hearts and minds with immorality, impurity or profanity?
  4. Lust: Another huge door that needs to be shut is lust in your mind. A woman once told me that she fantasized about the sexual lives of other couples. Whoa! I was so shocked I did not even have a response to that. I was saddened but not surprised when her marriage ended shortly thereafter and she quickly moved on to another man. Talk about a misuse of the eyes of your heart!

I won the battle with lust the year I focused on learning to abide in Christ. That included seeing Him at my right hand (Acts 2:25; Ps. 16:8) all the time. At the end of the year, the Lord pointed out to me in my two-way journaling that the darkness of lust had evaporated, not by attacking it, but by bringing in the light of His presence. Awesome! So I established a new rule in my life: no more frontal attacks on sin. Instead I will bring in the light of Christ’s presence by fixing my eyes upon Him, and darkness will flee as a byproduct!

Cultivate Marital Bliss

The other side of the sexual equation is celebrating the joy of physical love within the marriage. Again, satan will do everything possible to block this wonderful gift so that marriage partners are tempted to look elsewhere for fulfillment. Everything from unhealed sexual emotional traumas to ungodly beliefs about the beauty of sex to physical complications can become reasons or excuses to defraud our mates of the only safe and legitimate fulfillment of their sexual needs.

The list is endless, and if both spouses are not passionate about working through all these blocks so that sexual intimacy is wonderful and pleasant and frequent within their marriage, then that marriage is vulnerable to attack, because satan will plant the thought, “I could be fulfilled elsewhere” (I Cor. 7:1-5). Get counseling, read books, work hard and insure that your marriage is experiencing the marital bliss described in the Song of Solomon. Do not settle for anything less. The wise one asks for and receives counsel (Prov. 11:14). 


So let’s close all doors to the house of the harlot and keep far away from her. Let’s pursue the joy of sexual intimacy in our marriages as described in the Song of Solomon. Yes, it will take some work, but it is worth it. Let’s purpose in our hearts that by the grace of God satan will not pull us down through sexual immorality. We will walk pure and clean before our Lord.

Accept God’s forgiveness if you fail. Repent, receive cleansing by His blood, put on His robe of righteousness and recommit that by the power of the Holy Spirit, you will walk in purity and truth.

Create Two Powerful Pictures Which Impassion You

Pictures touch the heart and stimulate our emotions. Emotions move us to action. Create a passion for purity by mentally painting, journaling out and holding two very clear pictures in your heart:

One picture is all the ways sex outside of marriage will destroy your life, family, ministry, finances and health. Gather ideas by reading Proverbs 5 through 7. Pray, “Lord, show me clearly all the ways lust/pornography and adultery will bring destruction into my life.” Tune to Holy Spirit flow and vision as you write. When thoroughly formed, this picture should give you a sense of revulsion concerning sexual impurity, thus moving you to righteous action.

The second picture you should create is of the joy of marital bliss. Gather ideas by rereading Song of Solomon. Pray, “Lord, clearly show me the blessing it will bring into my life if I continue in the righteousness of pure sexual love. Show me what marital love is to look like.” Tune to Holy Spirit flow and vision as you write. When thoroughly revealed, this picture will draw you into joyful sexual intimacy with your spouse.

New eBook on Sexual Wholeness

The eBook How to Deal Effectively with Your Sexuality includes 30 pages of two-way journaling where God is speaking concerning how to handle one's sexuality, as well as exploring in more depth each of the ideas introduced in this blog. Purchase it today and make sexuality the blessing God has designed it to be. This book includes 30 pages of two-way journaling where God is speaking concerning how to handle one's sexuality, as well as exploring in more depth each of the ideas introduced in this blog. Click here to purchase.


Photo credits
"No Vacancies" - LeRamz
"Y
ou shall love the Lord your God 2" - SilentFury 

Related Blogs: 

Gifts of Healings   
Add new comment

Comments

Anonymous's picture

Dear Mark,

I read your post today regarding pornography and felt compelled to write to you about my experience.

My husband and I were both delivered completely from pornography while still in college. I don't mean to give a simple answer, but it involved three steps - what Jesus did in Matthew when he:
saw the multitude, was moved with compassion and healed them all.

First, God led us to see the "actors" in pornography for who they really were: exploited men and women created in the image of God and persons for whom Christ died. (This is a last resort kind of job, usually connected with drugs and all manner of organized crime.)

Second, once we saw them for who they were (exploited), and we saw ourselves for who we were, (redeemed children of God) . . . we knew immediately that partaking in this type of sexual sin WAS NOT WHO WE REALLY WERE. We were not exploiters, but called to be all Matthew 25 says we are to be and do. And with that realization came compassion and not impurity. Impurity was replaced by compassion.

Thirdly, healing came from Jesus. Immediately. The desire was gone. The struggle was now lifted to a higher plane. These people in the videos and on pages were someone's daughter, someone's son . . . and beloved of God. There was no way we could participate - it was time for us to be authentic . . . and being authentic meant being who we REALLY were: worshippers of the most high God - who longed to see God and ascend to his presence with clean hands and a pure heart. THAT IS WHO WE WERE! It was a lie that we were even interested in this stuff.

I drew great comfort from Psalm 27 and Psalm 91. It was a work of grace for us to tap into our identity in Christ. Back about 20 years ago whenever I would feel even a tinge of an urge, I would simply say, "That is not who I am." As the chorus and scripture says, "I am crucified with Christ never the less I live, but not I but Christ liveth in me and the life that I know live I live by faith in the son of God who loved me and gave himself for me."

I pray this will bring hope to those who have yet to realize that this behavior is "not who they are."
signed, "One so grateful for this work in her life and marriage as this year we celebrate 25 years together"

Add new comment

Results

Results 1 - 10 of 419

Pages

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 305 Pages

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond?


Price: $$12.95

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice (hard cover)

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 305 Pages

40% off the suggested retail price!

For the first time EVER! Hardcover copies of 4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice. This is a magnificent, beautiful gift to give for any occasion. Retailing at $24.95, you can purchase it through our website at only $15.00! Bless people with the gift of spiritual intimacy with the Lord Jesus Christ. Get a souvenir copy for yourself. Only 600 copies produced, so order while supplies last!

Price: $$15.00
4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice Audio CD Package

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice Audio CD Package

By Mark Virkler | 4 Keys book | 10 hours of CDs | LEARN notebook

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond?

Price: $$77.85
4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice DVD Package

4 Keys to Hearing God's Voice DVD Package

By Mark Virkler | 4 Keys book | 10 hours of DVDs | LEARN notebook

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond? When things don't seem to be going your way and your prayers aren't answered the way you had hoped, wouldn't it be great to hear Him tell you where He is in the midst of it, and what He is working out in your life? Are you ever just a little bit jealous of others who say with such confidence, "The Lord said...."?

Price: $$87.85
Hear God's Voice Guaranteed Package

Hear God's Voice Guaranteed Package

9 Books, 10 CDs, 10 DVDs now at a $30+ savings

Have you ever wished you could just sit down and have a long talk with the Lord? Wouldn't it be wonderful to move beyond having a theology that states that God loves you to actually hearing Him whisper words of love into your heart? When you're worried or confused, wouldn't you love to see the situation from His perspective and hear how He wants you to respond? When things don't seem to be going your way and your prayers aren't answered the way you had hoped, wouldn't it be great to hear Him tell you where He is in the midst of it, and what He is working out in your life? Are you ever just a little bit jealous of others who say with such confidence, "The Lord said...."?

Price: $$175.00
Prayers That Heal the Heart

Prayers That Heal the Heart

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 320 Pages

Prayer counseling that breaks every yoke! Everything you need to experience deep healing of your soul and spirit.

Did you know that you don’t need to be continually plagued by negative thoughts, feelings, pictures or memories?

Price: $$14.99
Hear God Through Your Dreams Workbook Cover

Hear God Through Your Dreams Workbook

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 92 Pages

A new book has just been released that accompanies this workbook: Click here for Hearing God Through Your Dreams by Charity Kayembe and Mark Virkler (featured on Sid Roth's "It's Supernatural", with over half a million views just on YouTube).


Do you often wake up feeling there was a significant message in your dream, but you’re just not sure what it is? Like Daniel and Joseph, do you long to be able to help others understand their own dreams and win them to Christ as you explain His night messages to them? Wouldn't it be nice if you could receive mid-course corrections from the Lord while you sleep? Do you wish you could be receiving divine inspiration, creative solutions to problems, and direction from the Lord during that third of your life that you’re “just” sleeping?

Price: $$11.95

Hearing God Through Your Dreams

by Mark Virkler and Charity Virkler Kayembe | 292 Pages

Learn How to Hear God’s Voice, Even When You Are Sleeping

It is always fun to be on the winning team. Well look what God has done with Charity's new dreams teaching. It has taken off like a rocket with a live TV interview on Cornerstone Network and her Sid Roth interview which has over 850,000 views on YouTube already!

Price: $$14.95

Counseled by God

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 146 Pages

Have you ever been defeated by negative emotions such as anger, fear, guilt, inferiority, condemnation or depression? Have you tried to fight them off unsuccessfully? Is there an answer that is deeper than simply trying to mentally reason yourself out of these emotions? Is there a way that Jesus can speak a word of life into the depths of your emotional despair and bring healing on a deep level? Is there a form of Christian counseling that begins and ends with the movement of Christ within your heart, rather than simply with the words of man?

Price: $$9.95

Everyday Angels

by Charity Virkler Kayembe and Joe Brock 289 Pages

You can partner with Heaven’s angelic hosts!

Do you have guardian angels? Does God want you to know them? Find out what Scripture reveals and how YOU can interact with the company of Heaven!

The supernatural realm permeates our natural world! Therefore, experiencing angels should be an everyday occurrence–we simply need to open our spiritual eyes to their reality and role in our lives.

Price: $$16.99

Pages